day 31... threatening countries

day 31.. and my task was "today threaten a foreign country" In essense i was required to issue an ultimatum to a country whose policies, general political stance or just existance i wasnt entirely happy with, Diplomacy is way too important  to be left to the government, they  will only Go in there too strong... as my friends will agree diplomacy has always been a strongpoint of mine.. I'm sure you will come to the same conclusion upon reading my delicately crafted letter to.....   which you should find below.



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Dear leader of  France

I have so far tolerated your country's behaviour in the spirit  of international forebearance, but enough is enough.

I am hereby issuing you with an ultimatum.
Either you desist from your obnoxious course of action or i shall be forced to invade, I have the full backing of my country's government and armed forces, which are at the ready to give you a good drubbing ,Should you prevaricate on this matter.

You have until 11.59 tonight to respond.

Truly, you will rue the day you offend me.

Yours sincerely

Mike

speaking on behalf of

England

xxx
xx
x
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Being a personable, friendly sort of chap i didnt want to get anyones back up, so i was carefull to use a gentle turn of phrase.. and to include the all important kisses at the end.. So now the leader of france is in no doubt that i wish to remain on friendly terms ( or so i would have him think), I merely disagree with the actions his country is choosing to take.. i was carefull not to be specific in the letter as to the cause of my anoyance , as secretly i want a war with france, and if he isnt sure which behaviour he has to change to avoid war.. he certainly wont manage it by 11.59.

But as were all friends here, ill tell you... the eating of frogs legs, the eating of snails (no animal rights issues just neither are meant for human consumption) , arrogance, calling the english channel the french channel, frances women not shaving their pits, excesive use of the shrug, being surrender monkeys. the fact that thierry henry was born and raised there.. and finally for being french. ( i could think of a thousand more but this will do for now)



mission completed.